Kate Middleton

Queen Camilla was also granted a new title.

Kate Middleton and Prince William brought a brand new future king into the world, but don't go thinking that the name they chose -- George Alexander Louis -- is symbolic or anything. Or that they still use a town crier to announce things in England.

Prince William and Kate Middleton showed off their Royal Baby to the peasants, and guess what? He looks like a baby.

Prince William and Kate Middleton's Royal Baby earned kudos from everyone all over the world, including those of us here -- you know, in that country that won the Revolutionary War -- and the royals issued appropriately and predictably polite, somewhat stiff statements about the birth.

Hear ye, hear ye! On this day, July 22, Prince William and yon wife Kate Middleton have successfully created the third successor in line for the British throne: a (still unnamed) baby boy. That's right, kids. The royal bun has officially exited the royal oven. And Kanye had nothing to do with it.

You probably heard the sad story about nurse Jacintha Saldanha, who committed suicide shortly after she was pranked by a pair of Australian DJs on the phone and connected their call to someone else who revealed information about Kate Middleton's pregnancy-related hospital stay. But while those DJs have taken the lion's share of the blame, Morrissey says someone else is responsible: the Royal Famil