Did you know that the deadliest creature in the world is one of the tiniest?

People ask me if I go camping. I answer...

"Curse word, curse word, curse word, NO!"

In fact, it baffles me that anyone would ever walk outside, let alone "camp". Why do  you go to work each day? To be able to afford a home with air-conditioning of course. If you've accomplished this, then why the hell would you leave said home for the deadly outdoors.

Snakes, ants, bears, lions, blood thirsty unicorns, they all hang out outside your home. So stay inside, and for the love of everything holy, don't leave the door open. If you do, you just might get invaded by the deadliest creature on Earth.

Hundreds of thousands of deaths each year are credited to the Mosquito. If you want to see what happens when this bitch bites you, then take a look at the video. I should warn you now that the "needle" that they stick you with is actually six needles. And to show you just how evil this creature is, when it's done feeding, it releases a parasite that could kill you. It does it just for fun.

So, to me, "Camping" is just God's way of thinning the herd. There's a reason his son was a carpenter people, and it wasn't to build a tent.