Three Myths About Black Fatherhood
I have learned over the years most things associated with black is normally negative. Just yesterday, one of my white girl friends asked me why black men cheated so much. I chuckled and told her, maybe it is just that we are more honest about the problems we have.
Truly, I see move reality news TV shows with white people being terrible parents and terrible mates to each other. The main thing we should all remember is that we are all people, with the same problems, so I doubt any race is doing anything more than the other.
As Father's Day approaches, I want to touch on some myths about black fathers. My daughters believe that their dad is the best dad in the world. The main reason for that I believe is me.
My daughters are only 4 and 5 years old, and their dad I separated when they were 1 and 2. Of course they saw me hurt, and began to hurt too, but I never once turned them against their father. I have always encouraged them to have a good relationship with their father no matter what was going on between us. He also has two sons from a previous marriage, and the same goes for them too. He has done a wonderful job at making sure all the kids know that he is there for them.
The three years that we were apart, their dad paid for mostly everything. He never got upset about child support and whenever I needed extra had no problem providing. So Happy Father's Day to him. But society comes up with all these studies stating that black fathers are overwhelmingly absent from their children's lives. In honor of Father's Day, let's put some of those myths to rest.
- Black Fathers Aren't Involved In Their Children's Lives -According to the Center for Disease Control black fathers spend more time with their children on a day to day basis than any other racial groups. The Pew Research Center estimated that 67% of black dads that did not live in the home, saw their kids at least once a month. For white fathers the number was 59% and Hispanic dads it was only 32%.
- Men Who Did Not Have Fathers Won't Make Good Fathers - There are stats that say that if there is no father in the home, the daughter is more likely to me a high school drop out and a victim of teen pregnancy. I grew up in a fatherless home, I graduated, no kids until I was married and in my 30's, we were not poor and my mom raised me herself. I turned out good and little black boys do to. The number of single-parent American households has tripled since 1960 and the number of black, single father house holds is on the rise too.
- Black Fathers Are An Anomaly - Black fathers are not like Big Foot, they exist. "Dare To BE Extraordinary: A Collection of Positive Life Lessons From African American Fathers" is a book written by William K Middlebrook. The book is part chapter-memoir, part call-to-action and part inspiration that honors the wisdom and teachings of black fathers. I know that this is true too because I have a black grandfather and father as well as my daughters having the same with a great-grand father.